This Is Why You’re Single: “I Can’t Date Someone Outside My Culture – They Won’t Understand Me!”

It seems now more than ever people are becoming more acceptable to the idea of dating outside of their race. Personally, I think dating someone who doesn’t share the same racial background can be exciting whilst learning about each other’s differences–it positions you to discover something new about that person’s culture. I’ve found, though, that while cultural differences do exist, several commonalities are often present.

There is absolutely nothing wrong about wanting to only date someone from the same race just as there is nothing wrong with wanting to date outside of one’s race; people like what they like. But for the skeptic who can’t score a date because they are still waiting for the that special someone who shares the same culture, I challenge you to reconsider your preferences.

Check out this post from one of my favorite bloggers.

*k*

You know that strange sixth sense you get when you can feel all the eyes in a room watching you? Like a giant spider peering into your soul, the room grows silent and all you can hear are a thousand eyeballs moving as you think to yourself, “goddamn, what the HELL are you all looking at?!” I knew I was the only Filipino in that Vietnamese restaurant, but damn, did I look that out of place? Then I realized something: they weren’t looking at me – they were looking at my girlfriend…

My Black girlfriend.

But I’ll get back to that story in just a minute…

One of the laziest excuses I hear from people uninterested in interracial relationships is their need to satisfy their culture. “How can I date a non-Indian man? What about my culture? How will he like my food?” “But, I’m a Black…

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Getting to Know Me: 15 Questions Answered (Part V)

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Source: ask.fm/elegantlychic

What’s your favorite seafood?
Somewhere between crab and grouper.

Do you want to be famous?
Yes and no. Yes, because I want to be given a platform where I can Give God the honor and glory and tell others how He got me to that point. I also want to show a different side to being a Christian. On the otherhand, I don’t want the stress of my every move being scrutinized. I’d definitely be one of those extremely private “celebrities.”

Hugs or Kisses?
Hugs. They feel really nice.

Have you ever fired a real gun?
Yes. But at an inanimate object, I swear.

What’s your favorite phrase in a foreign language?
건강하세요. (Geonganghaseyo.)

What is the most beautiful language?
Generally, people would say something like French or Portuguese. I’ve fallen in love with the Korean language, however. It’s difficult to learn because some of the words have unusual sounds. But the lilt, the various honorifics, and even the sounds are all beautiful in my humble opinion. I can’t wait for the day when I’m able to speak it fluently. (I’ve a long way to go.)
There are so many other languages that are just as beautiful, of course.

Would you rather be a lonely genius, or a sociable idiot?
Lonely genius. I think I already am. *laughs*

Do you collect anything? If so, what is it?
Odd rings. I haven’t bought any in awhile, but I’m thinking of starting a collection of watches, too.

Whom do you really love?
God.

What is your favorite dog breed?
Siberian huskies. Hopefully, I will have one someday.

What is the best way to learn a foreign language?
The best way? Be around someone who speaks it fluently as their native language. Or you could immerse yourself in the culture and learn that way, too.

What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done?
Shoot a gun.
(Don’t worry. It was in a controlled setting.)

Are you happy with the amount of information in your head?
Not at all. *laughs* I wish my brain had an off switch!

Do you prefer day or night?
Night. I tend to function better.

What do you think people think of you?
I believe people think I’m socially awkward, which I am. But I often feel that I’m misunderstood. I don’t reveal the real me to everyone–even close friends. If I did, they’d probably think I was a weirdo. When I’m really comfortable I can be funny and ridiculous. I rarely show that side of myself to others outside of family.

Music Monday: An Ultimate Love Song For You

Atlanta, GA native, Jamie Grace

Atlanta, GA native, Jamie Grace

Lately I’ve been consumed with all things pertaining to love. I’ve even convinced myself to believe that Spring is really the cuffing season of the year (sorry, Winter). Love is in the air, and everyone is basking in it, so it seems. This month’s music discovery fits the scenario wonderfully.

When I listened to “To Love You Back” by Jamie Grace the first couple of times, I cried like a baby. Meditating on the lyrics, I reflected on how God loves me despite my imperfections, my sins, and how I don’t have to feel guilty when I focus on His undying love for me. Then I started thinking of how wonderful it is to have someone to love me in the same capacity; that was when the tears really started to overflow.

Jamie sings about the kind of love I believe we all long for deep down. A love from someone who has a selfless heart. wpid-phpthumb-1.jpegWouldn’t that be the greatest thing of all much like the commandment itself? I strongly believe that this kind of love (agape love) is the love God intended for us to have in our significant relationships but only so many fail to reach.

There’s nothing more I can say but only to suggest for you to take a listen to the lyrics and imagine having such a love where your significant other loves you just as God loves you. You’ll likely not want anything short of it again.

(Either the day of or the night of our wedding, I don’t care. This song will be played.)

*k*

Jamie Grace – To Love You Back (Official Lyrics Video)

Crush Groovin’: The Series Finale

Oh my goodness! Has it really been a year since I’ve jumped into the blogasphere? It’s hard to believe I started Skinny Girl in a Curvy World last April! I’m surprised myself for committing to blogging for this long.

Here’s the thing: I dedicate most of my writing time to completing a story I’ve been working on for almost a year now that I don’t have time to write about thought-provoking topics. My thinking cap is too occupied with an imaginative world where people I create actually live. But blogging does have its perks even if it’s not my preferable thing to do as far as writing goes. (My strength and comfort zone is in writing fiction.) Ah, who am I kidding? Enough with the excuses. Let’s get on with the final entry for Crush Groovin’.

In the past, I’ve praised women who I thought were sexy and/or talented beyond measure. Women I thought possessed the qualities men want and the physical beauty that most women desire to have. Women like:

1. Esperanza Spalding: the talented jazz musician
2. DJ Havana Brown: the stylish Aussie D.J.
3. BoA: the Korean queen of K-Pop
4. Tracee Ellis Ross: the risible actress (with a home-grown derrière worth mentioning here)
5. Aaliyah: the beautiful angel gone too soon.
6. Tami Chynn: the Jamaican dance-hall prima donna
7. Tessanne: the powerhouse voice who actually won “The Voice”
8. Chrisette Michele: the spiritually gifted singer
9. Sarah Jessica Parker: the cute humanitarian actress
10. Sabi: Cali’s own beautiful songstress
11. Erykah Badu: the eccentric soul goddess
12.

Ironically, number 12 recently had a birthday this month (as in April, not May–depending on when I can get this published. Edit: it was published in May). It would’ve been nice if I would have had this entry written up by then, but of course . . . my timing is always lacking in perfection.

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Who gets the honor of being named my ultimate girl crush? She is by far the first woman I was ever inspired by when it comes to fashion even before she was globally recognized as a fashion icon and way before she made her mark as a fashion designer. She’s funny, attractive, fashionable, and British! She’s Victoria Caroline Adams Beckham Posh Spice, and yes, I want to be best friends For.Eh.Ver with her.

I’ve been staning this woman since 1997 when the Spice Girls first hit the international scene. The other girls were brash and in-your-face while the quiet one with the pout, dressed in “the little black Gucci dress,” was the one who really commanded your attention. I attribute my interest in fashion completely to her. Victoria somehow manages to make everything she wears look good, not the opposite. (I wish I could say the same for me. I’m just now learning how to really wear clothes.)

Victoria Beckham: My ultimate girl crush of all time. And here are the photos to prove it . . .

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Quote: "You're allowed to take the piss out of being thin. You're not allowed to say anything about people being fat.

You’re allowed to take the piss out of being thin. You’re not allowed to say anything about people being fat. -Victoria Beckham

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Her first official album. Thanks to Amazon, I ordered it as an import. One of my top 5 Pop albums on constant rotation to date.

Her first official album. Thanks to Amazon, I ordered it as an import. One of my top 5 Pop albums on constant rotation to date.

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I don't follow fashion and I don't follow trends. I just follow my instincts and think  what do I want to wear? What am I feeling for next season?

I don’t follow fashion and I don’t follow trends. I just follow my instincts and think what do I want to wear? What am I feeling for next season? -Victoria Beckham

Exactly my style! How elegantly chic!

Exactly my style! How elegantly chic!

Fun Fact: It wasn’t their catchy pop debut song Wannabe that pulled me into the fandom of the Spice Girls. 2 Become 1 earned my love for them. Traveling back to 1997, seeing the sassy energetic quintet in a time-lapsed video of New York City (the city I love) is when it all began. I used to watch Vh1 all day just to catch this on “Pop-Up Video.”

About Crush Groovin’:
Understand that this was my way of paying homage to twelve women . . . whom I can’t help but to fangirl over whenever I see them; that’s the best way I can word it. They are laudable women I relate to. They are women I would find attractive if I were a man. But since I’m not a man nor do I want to be, they are women I wish I could call up and maybe attend fashion week in Paris with or something. Or maybe we could trade beauty secrets! There are a few honorable mentions like Jill Scott, Shakira, Naomie Harris, Minzy and CL, Gwen Stefani, Kat Graham, and Iman. But listing twelve was my limit. Thus, this concludes Crush Groovin’. Thanks for reading. For additional eye candy, be sure to check out the others I’ve listed.

*k*